Alice has just announced that parrots don’t exist. She was so insistent about it, I could’ve almost been convinced, were it not for the fact that at the same time we were watching David Attenborough talking about parrots.
Me: They’re right there! Look! Parrots DO exist!
Her: No Daddy, they don’t. They’re not REAL.
Other drippings of remarkably adult insight have recently included:
“Go away, Daddy. Watch some telly or something. I need some ‘me time’.”
“Ugh! Don’t pick your nose, Daddy. I don’t pick my bottom and eat it!”