Conversations With My Daughter #78

How To Say Things To Children part 34:

[It is 8:30am. Alice is playing with Lego on the living room carpet. I am rushing around trying to get things ready before leaving for school]

Alice, come on! It’s 8:30!

“I’m playing, Daddy”

No, you can’t play now. It’s time for school.

“Pleeeeease…”

You’ll be late!

“One more minute…”

You’ve had plenty of minutes.

“One more sec…”

You’ve had plenty of secs.

what_the_hell_parks_rec

[There is a beat of silence. I leave the room so that I can quietly mouth ‘AAARGH CHRIST NO NO NO NO NONONONONO. WRONG. UUUUGGGGHHHH NONONONO’, and to scrape the surface of my tongue furiously. She didn’t notice.]

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